time does not exist &
even if it did, i would not believe it.

   there are silhouettes
   on the dance floor.
   there are silhouettes
   but no one is moving.
   there are silhouettes
   inside my rotten mouth:
   all these men in costume
   pulling teeth

                                     i am waiting
                                     for one to say,
                                     that’s enough.

i am waiting

          i am always waiting

i am not big enough to swallow all of this water, but i wish i was

                                                                                                                                               iamsoaked

your hand in mine    likeonefullbody   together

even if you grip tightly, what’s fluttering will always flutter away.

                                                            say all the following, slowly:

i don’t want. i don’t need to want. i am not a sheep. show me how to throw a lighter.

the sky opens suddenly & the city goes to hell [!]

everythingisburning. tiny flamesfall fromthesky.

this skyline is a heat map.
i see it all at once

don’t let go.
if you do, i can’t guarantee your safety

thelanguageisallfuckedup!    what i want you to do
is

                                                                                                                                            all of us on a boat—

i use my oar as my water cup                                       (i have gotten rather
our eyes are sunburnt & hollow                                    good at this).
iamnotasheep      tiny spittle
on god’s lip.

           he is doing this
          because he has to           he is doing this
                                               because he must

there are so many things to say. there are so many things to say by not saying anything at all

like this:

          little me   littleus   tiny river   tinytiny boat   this map   citiescitiescitiescities   rudderless oar
pitchblack lake   my head   your head   underwater   pullusboth             charcoal crown goodasgold

this is not a disaster story

this is not a story
about dying
or the end of the world
justus     this little boat

two oars.
one boat.

two oars & one boat

there are two oars in this one boat but we can no longer sit in it.

we sleep in the dry rot until the sun comes

when it won’t come
we don’t mourn it

know this if you know me/

i am not a sheep. when the city
burned, i let it:

i am full of both water & legs

i can’t even strike a match

everything is wetwetwet

on the balconies, they’re all sky fresh; white gowns untouched

[ when my tears burned
from my crackling face
even when     //even ]

i am saying this so you must listen

i am saying this because i care

know this know me knowthisknowme

knowknowknow

little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat

we don’t mourn
because we’ve lost it

( please don’t throw him a torch )

please don’t light fires on the balcony

everything being everything burning is enough

we are not hollow
but we are powerless.
we are asking for for-
giveness, but even that’s
not enough. we are ripped
out of the boat, into the sky

i don’t see the water anymore & i cannot swallow it

please don’t say anything at all

the screen is not dead, we are

my dead body like ur dead body is

      .everything is white (the chairs, my hands, his throne)

he is happy, but i am not happy enough

there are springs & meadows & everything that’s good &

the lighters won’t spark

& nothing here will

little me         little us   tinytiny boat

little me         little us   tinytiny boat

little me         little us   tinytiny boat

little me         little us   tinytiny boat

little me         little us   tinytiny boat

little me         little us   tinytiny boat

little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat
little me         little us   tinytiny boat

little me,
little us,
sunken boat,
dead boy—